Why “Getting My Body Back” Isn’t One of My Resolution’s

I see a lot of people posting pictures of their pre-baby bodies with captions of their New Year resolution being to “get it back.” Not me, & here’s why…

This is my pre mom body & I’m pretty proud I ever had that body, but I’m also pretty darn proud of my post baby body. Not because it’s great, but because it’s brought me great blessings. It also reminds me that my priorities have been helping them grow rather than shrinking my waistline. I am setting goals to make healthier choices & work out more, but getting that girl back isn’t my focus or a resolution for me, & if it is for you, I really think it should be to start appreciating your body instead. 

Photo cred: Christina Lynn Photography when I was pregnant with baby #2

If your goal is health, then by all means roll with it girl! But if it’s just to look hot in a swimsuit, you need to drop that resolution like it’s hot, & add recognizing your worth, appreciating your body for what it’s done, & practicing positive self-talk to your list of resolutions. 

I was almost 6wks pregnant here, & remember feeling uncomfortable that day, because my belly was bloated haha

Do I wish I still had that body? Hell yeah, look at it! But here’s the thing I recognize about that body & that girl. She hadn’t carried, birthed & nursed two babies, & she had a whole lot of time for self-care. Before kids I went to yoga every night of the week, sometimes twice a day, even jogging to my yoga studio at 5:30am, doing a class, jogging home to shower & get ready, & then going to another class when I got out of work. I played in a coed volleyball league, I swam laps when I went to the pool, & I sometimes skipped meals because I was too busy to eat or didn’t feel like cooking. All things that had to go or change significantly the minute I saw two pink lines on a stick. There’s no skipping a meal when you have growing children relying on you to prepare every meal. There’s not as much running off to an expensive gym when you have a baby to nurse or homework to help with, & your lucky to leave the kiddie pool, let alone actually get to swim when you have floatie adorning littles poolside with you.

I gained immense appreciation for the female body with my first baby. Pregnancy is absolutely incredible in itself (hello, you are literally growing a tiny human to come out & exist), but post-partum recovery & breastfeeding infinitely amaze me & demonstrate how our bodies are truly designed to do this. I wasn’t one of those girls whose pregnancy goal was to stay fit. There’s nothing wrong with that, & that’s great for the girls who are able to do it, but my main goal was to grow healthy babies, & have happy pregnancies, whatever that looked like for me. I also wasn’t too concerned with what I looked like in a nursing bra & panties after pregnancy either, especially since no matter what I was in was probably covered in milk or spit up anyway. I was focused on eating healthy foods in healthy portions to feed that baby every two hours with nothing but my body. I spent the majority of 2019 still nursing, building a therapy business, dabbling in side gigs to keep my toddler in Christian school a few days a week, coaching, & keeping up with the chaos of everyday life…& oh yeah, starting a blog. Its been a busy year, actually its been a busy five years since entering motherhood, & although I work out a little; a serious health & fitness routine just hasn’t made my list of top priorities. In fact, there were probably about eight other really important things above it that didn’t even happen, because there just isn’t enough time in the day. So I’ve accepted I’m not currently the eye candy I once was on the beach, but I am sporting some pretty adorable arm candy in each hand thanks to what this body gave me.

I’m sure when some people look at these pictures, all they see is a little more flab on my arms, an extra layer skin over my abs, that “the girls” sit a little lower than they used to, & that the only thing that’s gotten smaller on me is my thigh gap. I definitely see those things too, but I also see a body that proves this mom has made her kids, husband, career, & happiness her priorities. I’m not saying that a fit mom hasn’t done those things, I’m just saying everyone’s life (& body for that matter) are different. I definitely plan to have that body back someday, but I know it’s going to take time, & probably won’t make its come back till my baby making days are over. Till all my kids are in school, or I can afford to use a sitter more often. As for right now, I recognize I’m in the thick of it (literally hahaha). During this period of life, my days revolve around others, so as long as I can chase my kids around the yard without getting winded, & am maintaining a healthy lifestyle; I’m okay with not looking like a supermodel.

Someday I plan to look a little more like my old self. I remember after I finding out I was pregnant, looking my husband dead in the eye, motioning my hand over my whole body & saying “I will carry, birth & nurse all of your babies, but you will pay to put all of this back the way you found it.” Obviously diet & hard work can get
your body back in shape, but if you were a nursing momma, you know the girls just aren’t coming back, so I’m in full support of any woman getting a little help in that department after spending years of being so selfless with her body. So far I haven’t even had so much as a Botox injection, but I’m not against anything that makes a woman feel good (as long as they don’t completely change the way they look) so shame on anyone who puts a woman down for it.

At the end of the day I don’t need people to look at me & think I’m a hot mom. All I need them to see is that I’m a passionate, fun, present mom who loves her life & family. The only person I need to get going is my husband, & believe me sometimes I wish that was a little harder than it is ha. One thing motherhood has shown me is that love really is blind, & that my husband definitely loves me. I saw this first hand New Years eve four years ago when Matt tried to get me to wear a top he had always liked on me. I kept telling him it was too small, but he didn’t understand how that was possible. I finally tried it on to shut him up & didn’t even want to walk out to show him. I knew he wouldn’t stop pestering me if I didn’t, so I did & his reaction was 100% genuine in that he loved it! Ya’ll, it was not a good look. Like, I’m not a judgmental person & never would have said anything out loud but, I definitely would have thought “oh honey, that outfit’s not for you” in my head if I saw me walk by ha. But here he was arguing with me that I looked “smokin hot” & that I should only care what he thought anyway. That was the moment I knew he really loved me, & that I could never, ever ask him for clothing advice again.

My point is this ladies, get healthy yes, but don’t kill yourselves trying to be perfect or beat youselves up. Yeah, it’s great if we make it back there someday, but recognize that where you are now is pretty amazing too. You really are beautiful the way you are, & hey, the extra cushion is a comfy place for your little one to snuggle into & the stretch marks are your earned stripes of love & strength. Besides, I hate to break it to you, but no matter what you do there is ALWAYS going to be a prettier, younger, or just different looking girl that could make you feel insecure if you let them. So, this year I want to encourage you to focus on all of the beauty your body holds & being your own biggest fan. I haven’t learned a whole lot in my mere thirty-one years, but I know without a doubt that a confident woman is a sexy woman, & that a real man will find that hotter than anything else.  I’m not what I used to be, but I feel good in my skin. I think I still look pretty good, & I appreciate what my body has gone through. So let’s all cheers our mom bods with a glass of clean crafted NV Rivamonte Prossecco, because why not drink prosecco that’s half the calories & carbs if we have the option, right? Then we can all wake up without the hangover & hit gym, or just walk around Target with our whining kids knowing we look dang good in them yoga pants just the way we are.